Put the joy in

I spent the weekend with my parents and on the drive from the airport my mom told me about a friend of hers who she is a little concerned about.  It seems that she lost some weight on WW two years ago and is so concentrated on maintaining that weight loss that she obsesses about food.  This makes it hard to eat around her sometimes for all her rules.  Two years is a long time to be obsessed.  And I really don't want that to be me.  And this sounds a bit like me now.

Dinner has long been a battle around here.  My son hates my dinners.  Why?  Because they are healthy.  And for a while now I've felt like that battle isn't worth it.  Will he be malnourished if I give in a little bit?  Probably not.  Look at my husband.  He didn't grow up with good food models and he seems to be just fine.  I'm the fucked up one.

I've lost the joy in making food and sometimes recently even I think the food tastes too healthy.  And this shouldn't be its primary function.  It should provide nourishment, yes.  But eating dinner together should be a positive shared experience.  I think I need to put the joy back into the food.  Make it primarily yummy and have healthy be the secondary function.

I read recently that the mood you are in impacts the speed of digestion.  Sadness slows it down.  I don't want to be sad while I eat.  I want to put the joy back in.  Balance, as ever, is key.